I'm a winner, not a loser!


 

Many times, I came to know from the news channel, print, and social media that somebody, somewhere ended his life. Right from primary to college students dedicate their lives, and their valuable time, working hard day and night 365 days to achieve success in the form of government scholarships and others such as IMO, IEO, and NSO. Similarly for admissions to NEET, JEE (IIT IIM) UPSC, MPSC, and many more. Sometimes unfortunately do not succeed or are unable to achieve their goals which have been pressurized by parents, neighbours, relatives, and the surrounding competitive environment.

Right from childhood parents raise their kids by keeping the objective to make them doctors, IITain, collectors, government administrators, and infinite objectives of individual parents. Keeping the expectations from our kids is not a bad thing but not making them all-rounder concerning physical, mental, and social compatibility and growth is the unfortunate link of their failure. I have seen dozens of examples where institutions, Universities, government, parents, and students do not have any interest in physical, mental, and social health. Everywhere, everybody and so-called educationalist whole day talking about careers, education policies, and skills but shut their mouth about overall development. When children start to grow, they are trained by only one mantra study, study, and study by a ringmaster.

Students start their day morning at 5 o'clock and remain busy with their schedule of classes, extra classes, tuition, coaching, and examinations till midnight or onward. They don’t get enough time to enjoy their food which is the most important component in the growth and development of the students. They don’t get enough time to entertain themselves to understand what is good and what is bad. Due to their busy schedule, they usually eat outside street food/ fast food (Street food and fast food help them to relax their stress is a big misunderstanding) which is unhygienic and not ideal for their mental and physical growth. And it's not surprising that the data which is available on the official website maximum percentage of children, adolescents, and college students having nutritional deficiency at growing levels will badly impact physical and mental growth.

 The growth mostly depends upon nutrients and micronutrients such as vitamins, minerals, essential amino acids, proteins, and carbohydrates. Just imagine if the growing children are not getting sufficient amounts of nutrients and micronutrients definitely will impact their overall health. Additionally, during this time the lifestyle of the students became the mostly worst.

During the race some may succeed some may not succeed in scoring good marks/grades in the examinations and unable to handle the stress and pressure. They can't come up with the problems. They don't know how to relax? how do chill out from the stress? They don't have the confidence to compete in competitions created by their parents, educational institutes, themselves, and society. Unfortunately, one day the news flash the XYZ student ended their life by committing suicide.

To end life is not an option or solution it’s the degree of not understanding the preciousness and value of life. The success of any individual does not depend upon how they do hard work it mostly depends on their physical, mental, and social health. But it's very difficult to make them understand so-called wise parents, giving importance to studying but not life.

Hard work is important but it's never a substitute for health. Winning the race by compromising health is not success it is a failure. Expectations from the kid are not a bad thing but proper planning and execution without disturbing the health is ideal for the student.  Somehow, they will manage to succeed, but as they enter into the actual responsible and professional life various factors force them back such as toxic work environment, unethical practices, corporate work stress, competition fear of failure, and zero support system. This leads to increased stress levels, feelings of failure, health issues, and mental instability surrounding the individual, and most of the time under the fear of failure mind gets diverted towards bad habits is the most worrying part of the story.  

In Ayurveda and modern medical science, it is said that stress is the mother of all diseases or disorders. As the stress level goes on the body responds in the form of abnormalities called disease or disorder. I may not be surprised by looking at the data available on the media portals, that the health of the primary to college student population is not good (At present government is putting their every effort into improving the health and education system sunrise after night). This population faces very critical problems right from cold cough allergy to severe Lifestyle diseases such as cancer, diabetes, hypertension, arthritis, mental disorders, depression, skeletal problems, and so on. 

I learned from print, electronic, and social media that somebody finishes their life when he or she is at the peak of success. Students from the IIT, and IIM, doctors, engineers, professors, successful businessmen, IAS officers, IPS officers, Sants, and social reformers ended their lives at the peak of success. This indicates having a lot of fame, property, a bungalow, bank balance, position, and modern lifestyle is not a symbol of success.  The level of satisfaction, happiness, entertainment, and enjoyment indicates success.

When you look at the other side the student population learned in minimum resources and from small schools. They may have little or big success but you will not find their story anywhere in the print and social media that they have ended their life. You will not find such a story of the students or the people struggling to run their houses but not end their lives. You will not find the story of the worker; daily wages people have ended their lives. You know why because they know the importance of life, they know how life is, they know how to come up from stress, and they are satisfied with their life what they have? Even though they have less money, a small house, and many problems and struggle still they are happy because they know how to play the game of life. Their confidence that today I may not be the winner, tomorrow may not be but surely the day after tomorrow is mine. That confidence makes them alive, bonding with the family makes them alive, affection for a life makes them alive, their chill-out nature keeps them alive and most importantly they know the meaning of success keeps them happy and alive in difficult times. In my 23-year career I have seen many backbenchers struggle to pass the degree with extra years but still they are at the highest position in the profession.

 Following are some solutions to overcome or minimize the above problem.  As I am not an expert but based on my 23 years of experience as a teacher, researcher, and administrator I list the following solutions

1. Right from schooling develop your child physically mentally and socially

2. Make them understand the meaning of education in the true sense. Education is  earned not to score marks, or grades in examinations but to overall development to create good human beings. If you are a good human being success will follow you

3. Parents need to be sensitive to the overall development of their kids

4. Social involvement needs to be increased

5. 1/4th of the time to be allotted for practicing yoga, pranayama, meditation, sport, entertainment, cultural activities, brainstorming sessions, life problem-solving ability (not a mathematical problem) educating hygienic practices, frequent interactions between the kid's parents, teachers, and psychologist

6. Time and freedom to be given to talking on the topic of their interest, the topic of their skills, the topic of their understanding, a topic which is closer to their heart.

7. Health counselling and health awareness must be a compulsory component of the system (not just a formality many more schools, colleges, institutions, organizations, and Universities only celebrate the international day or week in a year which will not fulfill the  objective of the health counselling and awareness)

8. Parents need training to raise kids with a balancing life principle (As per our ancient literature parents are the world’s best leaders and managers but not necessarily all may have good parenting)

9. The behaviour of the parents needs to be changed against their kids and importantly to provide an environment that will not disturb kids.

10. Create a good human being not a robot which will work on the instructions given by the books, teachers, schools, and parents.

11. Grow your kids naturally not artificially 

12. The education department needs to be engaged in the teacher's training (in a true sense not formality) which will help them to tackle the problems associated with the students.

13. Schools Teachers, schools, and parents have to be strictly punished for creating unnecessary pressure on kids

14. Exam reforms are seriously in demand for the natural growth of the students. Additionally, If any student fails an examination, immediate examination should be conducted without keeping a waiting period

15. Score cards grades, medals, and merit will not decide the destiny of the student their confidence, maturity, understanding, knowledge, and connectivity make them idols of society.

16. The university and education departments immediately stop to display the meritorious list of students

17. Every teacher tries to invest 5 -10 minutes in every class for the overall development of their students rather than bombarding the syllabi.

18. Institutions need to bring out the students from the four walls of classrooms and make them learn in the natural environment (Back to the ancient gurukul system)

19. More emphasis may be given to practical, instrumentation, case studies, surveys, seminars, group discussions, skill development, and healthy practices.

20. 50% scores must be given for non-theoretical parts

Problems are part of life, not a life. If you have the problem and having the solution is okay but if the problem is not having a solution chill out let it be on the almighty god. Being a proud Bhartiya we have entered the moon, and we are in the race for the third largest economy in the world, We are moving towards a developing country, and we have a good infrastructure but unfortunately, we are going behind the health indicator. Being a highly populated country it's very difficult to expect the government to reach out to every individual but being part of this country it's the responsibility of every individual, every school, organization, institution, University, and education department to help out the student’s community to bring them back to the true environment which will propel the growth of the students who is the future of this country.

Just I want to conclude that life is very precious, and valuable don’t end your life before the age of a hundred. Problems are a part of life not life, don't take life too seriously, just enjoy, entertain, and celebrate either success or failure. Before ending your life think about your beloved, think about your colorful life which is on the way, think about the generations that are growing up looking at you, think about the efforts, pains, and struggles of your parents, and think about the person most precious, valuable and close to your heart. Think about the people, neighbours, and friends who will be waiting to tell you loser. There is not a single person in the universe not having the problem, even though almighty god has a problem from haters. And think about people like me having pain when we read the bad news in the media. Chill out the life, take a long breathe and say I am a winner, I am a winner 🏆 Not a LOSER

                                                      

Dedicated to all dear students working hard for their success

Comments

  1. Very valuable words Sir, competition and rat racing is new normal now, at the same time we shouldn't forget that the life is actually starting after the result of the race or competition. I feel that if you win then you should be able to digest that achievement and continue the same process, don't stop anywhere. If failure is the result, then one should be able to find the best possible opportunity available after the failure rather than give up.

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  2. Nice words sir study and enjoyment should be hand in hand and life skills are also equally important.

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  4. Very informative, Superb article, May bring changes in life of many Students and Parents.. Thank you..!!

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  5. Important topic Sir.
    You have covered almost all crucial aspects of this topic.
    Rather than students; parent counseling is need of hour.
    The scenario in Nanded, is self explanary.
    In a single small city thousands of students are carrying dream to become doctor. Parents'expectation could be a reason for this.
    Another point you rightly mentioned is role of our teaching-learning process as well as teacher can play vital role.

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  6. The article is so nice and apt to current scenario about the stress for unrealistic goals and forgetting the essence of living a happy life. Dear Sir, you have covered every small datails on the subject and I am sure that it will be an eye opener for those who are the victims. Parents may play a crucial role while upbringing their children. I hope they will.

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  7. Respected sir your blog is really a eye opener for all the members of society & this is the irony of Indian society, every parents put their children's in rat race & big competition which is really a very harsh thing & due to this unrealistic dream chase students unnecessarily propelled themselves towards the end of their precious life. I remember the scene of "Chichore movie" in which the same thing is happened due to failure he ended his life thats why it is very important to teach our students how to digest failure instead of how to celebrate success.Parents must focused on their ward physical,mental & social development & that is the only way out....

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